depression

Add to Cart: What Are You Really Shopping For?

Add to Cart: What Are You Really Shopping For?

Sometimes, your day just really sucks. So you re-do your most recent Postmates order, put your favorite Broad City episode on for the eighty millionth time, and open up ASOS to look at the new arrivals. Two hours later, you’ve spent all your grocery money for the week on the cute shoes you felt like you absolutely needed. (They sold out last time!)

What if You Made Friends with Your Depression?

What if You Made Friends with Your Depression?

If you’ve been living with depression, you have probably tried everything to get rid of it.

It’s not as easy as just “cheering up” or “focusing on the positive,” is it? Well-meaning friends and family love giving this advice, but obviously if you could, you would have by now! Instead, you’ve tried distracting yourself by trying to constantly have fun, avoiding uncomfortable situations and focusing on anything that could be considered “self-care” (whatever that means), or just giving in and staying in bed, hoping it would clear up.

Sometimes that works! But inevitably, it comes back. Then you’re not only depressed, but frustrated that you’ve “let” depression take over again, which makes you even more depressed, irritable, and exhausted.

It’s totally normal to avoid things that make us feel uncomfortable. Whether it’s physical pain like a toothache, or something hitting us in our emotional gut, like a bill we can’t afford to pay. For some, if left unchecked, this can lead to even more depression. Avoidance and procrastination can tend to make things worse, despite the fact that they are usually just coping mechanisms for situations that are overwhelming or feel out of our control.

How New Traditions Can Help with Holiday Depression

How New Traditions Can Help with Holiday Depression

If the end-of-the-year holiday traditions are bringing up conflicted feelings for you, you’re not alone. For many people, feelings of nostalgia can bring up regret; trying to create (or re-create) community can feel isolating; and even joyful activities can remind us of old pains that we usually try to ignore.

Anyone who has tried to maintain a holiday tradition in the wake of a loss or major life change can tell you: Trying to keep things as they were is its own kind of torture.

When to Check on Your Strongest Friend

When to Check on Your Strongest Friend

We need to feel discomfort first, for it to go away. This doesn’t mean you have to dwell on it for days or weeks. In fact, you’ll be surprised at how even a 20-minute conversation with someone who is listening can ease your pain. Here are some questions you can ask.

Watching Your Bloopers vs Your Highlights

Watching Your Bloopers vs Your Highlights

What's more fun? Watching the "highlight reel" or the "blooper reel" of life?

Does it help you personally to relive the times you **nailed it**, or to dissect the times you screwed up? To celebrate your success, or to wallow in your failure? Which is more useful? More educational? More revealing?

Frustrated That Your Goal-Setting Isn't Working?

Frustrated That Your Goal-Setting Isn't Working?

If your goal-setting isn't working, it might be because you're focusing on the wrong tasks. Have you ever set a deadline...and then kept moving it? Do you want to be a marathon runner but don't know where to start? Use this guide to figure out how to bridge the gap between where you are and where you want to be.

How to Identify Your Own Toxic Behavior

How to Identify Your Own Toxic Behavior

Aren't we as adults accountable for our own actions? But then, isn't everyone else responsible for theirs?

I recently spoke with Annamarie Higley at Brit + Co about how to identify our own toxic behavior. I think of this as our secret weapon when we're ready to try therapy.

I Think I'm Feeling Burnt Out. What Do I Do?

I Think I'm Feeling Burnt Out. What Do I Do?

No one has a stress-free job (or life), even though some people's Instagram accounts would have you believe that. 

Setting up built-in reinforcements to protect you from routine stress is essential to preventing burn out. We need to decompress, recharge, and get ready for the next challenge.

The Nice Person's Guide to Setting Boundaries

The Nice Person's Guide to Setting Boundaries

Yeah, ok. You keep hearing about "the importance of setting boundaries" and you kind of have an idea of what people mean by that. (It's just saying "no" a lot more frequently....right?)  

How do you set limits without hurting people's feelings? Especially when you don't even intend to be hurtful, but people take it the wrong way? Sometimes it feels easier to just give in and hope the other person notices that they're asking too much.

How Being the "Black Sheep" of your Family Affects your Mental Health

How Being the "Black Sheep" of your Family Affects your Mental Health

The black sheep of the family is the outcast, seen as different, written off. At best, they're playfully teased; at worst, they're rejected. The more they're ridiculed, the less likely they are to open up and share things about themselves. The less they share, the more of an outcast they become. 

Why does this happen, and what can you do about it?

Being Seen For Who We Truly Are

Being Seen For Who We Truly Are

When you’re dismissed, erased, ignored, attacked, or denied - it can cause you to question yourself. It can cause you to feel angry, to feel defeated, to get overwhelmed, to test people, and to feel like you have to prove who you are to yourself and others every day.

Am I Ready to Start Therapy?

Am I Ready to Start Therapy?

For people who are used to handling things alone, it can be difficult to know when to seek professional therapy. Like most folks, you probably brush off your problems and wait for them to go away on their own. And that seems to work most of the time.